Mid Season Update!
A lot has happened since my last blog, so this feels like the perfect time to reflect on the first part of my season and share what’s coming next. It’s hard to believe that the opening stretch of the season is already behind me and that the next race I’m preparing for is Unbound. I would love to say everything has gone exactly to plan, but the start of the year has not unfolded the way I hoped. Over the years, racing has taught me that there are often more bad days than good ones, and that the only way forward is to learn from setbacks without being too hard on yourself. That is something I still struggle with, as I am both a perfectionist and extremely hard on myself. I want to represent my sponsors and myself at the highest level and deliver the results I know I’m capable of. It can be difficult when training is going well but race day arrives and something just doesn’t click. In the rest of this blog, I’m going to walk through the races I’ve done so far, what has gone well, what I’ve learned, the frustrations I’ve faced, and how I want to move forward. I hope you enjoy the update.
I started the season at Santa Vall in Girona, which is always an incredibly hard and competitive race, with many of the top riders lining up to test their early-season form. I felt confident going into the race and was excited to test out the new Basso Palta 3. Unfortunately, during the first stage, I had a race-ending mechanical only 40 km in, and just like that, my race was over. I was extremely disappointed because, despite feeling strong that day, I never really had the chance to show it. Mechanical issues are part of gravel racing and something you have to accept, but that doesn’t make them any easier. I was able to race the second day, which was a flat and fast course, and while there wasn’t much to report, I was glad to at least finish the weekend. Even though Santa Vall left me frustrated, I was also eager to turn the page quickly because the following weekend brought my first UCI race of the year: UCI Castellon. I was especially excited for Castellon because it was close to where I was staying in Girona, the course was mountainous and well suited to my strengths, and I would be spending the weekend with my friend and fellow competitor Eluska. On race day, though, I had a poor start and used far too much energy chasing into the first climb. To make a long story short, I blew up too early and spent most of the day chasing on my own. I had gone into that weekend hoping for a top-five result, but I didn’t race as tactically smart as I needed to and let my nerves get the better of me. I was disappointed by those first races, but I was also looking forward to having a month to reset, focus on training, and get ready for my next race block: The Hills, Sea Otter, and The Traka.
Post race with Paula and Theresa!
First up was The Hills, which went okay for me. I finished 12th on an extremely hard and technical course. It was probably the most difficult and demanding course I have ever raced, but it was also a fun and safe event and one I am always happy to attend. After The Hills, I felt like I was building some momentum heading into Sea Otter. I was especially excited for that trip because I was there as a brand ambassador with ASSOS. It was also the first Lifetime Grand Prix race of the year and my first opportunity to race against many of the American riders. Even though the course suited me well, I didn’t have my best day. I missed the split going into the first singletrack and spent the rest of the race fighting through groups. It was a very hard day physically. I was still feeling tired and jet-lagged from travel, and I also had some stomach issues. Even so, I was incredibly grateful to be there with ASSOS and did my best to make the most of the opportunity. While the result was not what I had hoped for, I came away from the week feeling very lucky to represent a brand like ASSOS and to spend time with such an amazing group of staff and fellow ambassadors.
The Hills!
Photo: Twila Muzzi
Sea Otter!
Photo: Michael Chan
After the quick trip to California, I came back to Europe to prepare for The Traka, one of my biggest goals of the year. I’ve travelled a lot between North America and Europe and dealt with travel stress and time-zone changes before, but for some reason this round of jet lag hit me especially hard. After about a week, I finally started feeling better on the bike and sleeping more normally again. Then race week arrived. I was nervous, excited, and carrying big goals for the day. This was going to be my last year racing the 200 km event, as I would like to do the 360 km next year, so I really wanted to get a good result. I knew the course well after riding it all winter, and I felt confident, strong, and ready. But just a few days before the race, everything changed. I was riding on the bike path just outside Girona when another cyclist tried to pass me, clipped me, and caused me to crash hard. At first, I was mostly in shock. I had blood all over my hand and arm (needed stiches), a dent in my helmet, and no real idea how it had happened. The cyclist apologized and kept going, but thankfully some kind people on the path stopped to help and made sure I was ok to get home. I ended up with significant road rash and a lot of soreness, especially in my neck. Even so, I was fully locked into Traka mode and convinced myself that nothing was going to stop me. Over the next few days, I ignored what were likely symptoms of whiplash and concussion because I wanted to race and I wanted a result. On top of not feeling well physically and worrying about how my body would respond, I also found this year’s Traka week mentally draining and stressful. The week is all-consuming, and there is a lot to manage. I was staying about 35 minutes from Girona with my friend Paula, who was also racing the 200, and my sister Sophie. Without much outside help, though, I was also acting as my own mechanic, chef, driver, and everything else. The logistics, combined with the injury, made the whole week feel hectic.
I’m incredibly grateful to my sister for helping in the feed zone, driving, and being such a great support throughout the week. One of the biggest things I learned from Traka this year is just how much gravel racing has grown and how professional it has become. There are now full teams with multiple staff members and mechanics supporting riders. As a privateer, that made me realize I need to think carefully about where I race and how I can make logistics easier on myself while still staying within budget. It is becoming increasingly difficult to compete at this level without the same, or at least similar, support as many of the riders around me. Looking back on the race itself, I know I should not have started. I had a very hard day and didn’t get the result I wanted. This was one of the bigger disappointments of the season so far because, before the crash, I truly felt capable of a top-10 performance both physically and mentally. Instead, I finished the day feeling completely empty and disheartened. In the days after the race, my body and head started to feel worse and worse, and I ultimately had to take some time off the bike to heal properly. Having dealt with concussions before, I know they are not something to take lightly, and racing 200 km of gravel in that condition was probably not my best decision. I started feeling a bit better toward the end of last week, although my neck is still quite sore and I’m doing everything I can to resolve that. On May 13, I flew back to Canada, and now my full focus is on Unbound. I’m about one and a half week out, and I’m hoping this week my body gets back to normal so I can put together a solid training block and rebuild my confidence. As I return to North America for the rest of the season, I feel like I’ve already learned a lot this year about bike setup, fueling, and the tactical and technical areas I still want to improve. I have a big goal in mind for Unbound, but more than anything, I want to be patient with my body so I can arrive in the best place possible both physically and mentally. This will be my third Unbound, so hopefully third time’s the charm. I know that when everything comes together on the day, I can be there with the best. Now it’s about trusting that and showing up ready.
The Traka!
If you made it all the way to the end, thank you. That was a long one, but it felt like a much-needed update. Stay tuned for more on my training and preparation heading into Unbound.